"Don't say 'Go away' if your heart is saying a wise 'I forgive.' Don't say 'I forgive' when your heart is saying a wise 'Go away.'" -Paulo Coelho's Facebook post of 11/16/2011
"If everybody loves you, something is wrong. You can't please everybody." - Paulo Coelho's Facebook post of 11/17/2011
These both connected to what I have been experiencing over the past week. A friendship has been quite tumultuous, at least on his part. Over the years, he has occasionally had 'outbursts' about me not calling him - ones not really appropriate for a friendship, seeming more like a spurned lover. He gets upset and I end up talking to him at length about how he feels, and promising to call him, or email him, or whatever.
I am so tired of emotionally manipulating men, and my own stupidity in not trusting what my heart says about them. I finally asked him: "What are your intentions toward me?" He was like: "What? do you think I have romantic intentions toward you?" God! Hello? If you don't realize that can happen, in general, and address it as an adult, you are not an adult. Oh well, a lovely person, but there are other lovely people out there. Sometimes it's better to let go of a friendship.
This is ultimately the tragedy of human existence - why must we lose friendships? Why must children be born to married couples who lose their friendship? Why must we be deprived of love?
He sounds like a classic codependent personality and I mean that in the actual psychological sense rather than the "pop" psychological sense - but the word "tumultuous" was what triggered it for me. Not necessary - and I would know - no?
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