At lunch my friend shared a very interesting learning experience with me along with exciting ideas on leadership and authenticity. A story she shared helped reminded me of when I had to give a message to a student I absolutely hated giving and which I delivered in a way that it was very hurtful. It was about a very unfortunate outcome (we would not be able to pay him money) which was a result of his actions which were based on misinformation his department had given him. When I realized what had happened, I decided to tell him because I thought he should know what was coming (not what he expected).
It came across as cold. He must have been very upset because his adviser actually emailed me to tell me what a horrible email I had sent. I, in turn, felt very upset. Wasn't it obvious I was just the bearer of bad tidings?
After my conversation today, I reinterpret what happened as me staying in my mental capacity, not my feeling capacity, in order to protect myself and my organization. This is when the most hurtful things are said.
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